Just keep moving don’t get stuck there; that’s what Allen told me. “It’s ok to be mad, it’s ok to be sad and to morn; just don’t get stuck there. We have to find the strength to pull ourselves out of despair and start new sometimes. Don’t be afraid of change, we HAVE to be adaptable to change and to consistently take inventory of our self. Take time to pray and to meditate. Find your serenity, LET GO AND LET GOD and focus on one day at a time.” – Allen
He amazes me every time I see him. He now gives me advise and comforts ME. He knew I was having a hard time with Mariah’s death. I try not to show it when I’m with him because I want to be strong for him but he knows me all too well. It’s been six weeks since her death. Our hearts are still broken but now we can at least talk about her without breaking down. I can tell Allen is trying so hard to sort through his emotions, he has so many memories that are good and bad and a ton of regrets. His mind is so cluttered with all his thoughts from his past that he gets a little lost in there but thankfully he has some really good mentors he can call and talk to. Come to find out he’s a lot stronger and more put together than I realized. He has had so much support where he’s at. After her death his sober community all gathered around him and poured nothing but love and hope into him on a consistent basis even to this day. I LOVE THOSE PEOPLE! Recovering addicts and families of addicts are the most compassionate people I’ve ever met. I think it’s because they have been through hell and back, been judged and discarded. They understand all about the realities of life and how unpleasant it can be. And they understand all too well about loss.
On December 14th Allen started NEW. He registered for school and is now attending Arizona College studding to be a medical assistant. His long term goals are to further is education to be a Nurse Practitioner and eventually work at a recovery treatment center. I give all glory to GOD!