Thursday, March 12, 2015


Last week my husband and I where making dinner. He goes to the kitchen drawer and grabs the foil. Opens the lid, pulls a sheet of foil out. As he rips the foil from its box the sound of the foil crinkling makes me cringe. At that moment my husband looks up at me and says “I don’t know about you and I can’t even imagine how it makes Allen feel but… I’ll never look at foil the same again. I don’t like using it anymore, it makes me sick”  I looked up at him and said “ME TO!!” Crazy, right? 

I noticed one day while cooking, I was subconsciously avoiding having to use the foil. When I bake now instead of using foil to cover my baking dish I put a cookie sheet over it instead. I've never done that before, not until I started finding burnt foil in Al’s room from his heroin days.  I thought I was the only one who felt this way about foil. So when my husband said this out of the blue I felt so relieved, I felt normal for having these feelings. When I told Al about the conversation I had with his dad about this, I’ll never forget the look on his face. We were driving on our way back to Crossroads when I asked him if he felt this way too… his eyes got wide and I could see the anguish in his stare as he looked at me with this intense look of bewilderment. Before I could finish my sentence he said “YES… ME TOO… I feel the same way mom” he said “when I hear foil being used at work in the kitchen or at Crossroads, I get the chills all over my body, every hair stands up on end and start to shiver”. He explained it in such a way that I FELT those chills he was describing, and I felt his anguish in the pit of my stomach.

 It’s like a ghost that comes to haunt him daily.  

It made me sad!

BUT… He’s still fighting off those ghost!!

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