When Al was on heroin we never saw him. He stayed away, we saw him maybe 5-6 times in a year.Each of those times where heart wrenching. He was skin and bones... a hollow vessel going though the motions. At times it was worse seeing him than not seeing him. Because we couldn't do anything to help him. He was so engulfed in that world that he couldn't hear me, he could see he was losing himself. I have a picture of him on his 21st birthday. (below) His skin was this bleak greyish color and he looked as if his soul was being held hostage. Although he smiled for the picture it was just a mask to hide his pain and I could see right though it. I remember that clearly. He was there but a million miles away. I remember when my niece sent me that picture in a text message I took one look and just broke down and sobbed. It's hard to believe that was only 4 month ago.
Al's 21st Birthday