I'm struggling.... I really hate life. Everyday I have to fight myself to get out of bed. I'm training myself to be numb, to not care. That's the only way I'm going to get though this. That sound coming out of your mouth are just words, they don't mean anything, they are JUST words! If I can master that then I think I can manage this crappy fucked up life and get by. When I laugh and smile, it's not real, it's just a mask I put on for everyone so they feel better. I'm so damn angry!! I have family telling me I have to move on let him go and just wait until he's ready. Blah blah blah. That's easier said than done. He's my son... my beautiful boy, how can I move on knowing he's slowly killing himself with every inhale of heroin he smokes. He could be shooting up now... it's possible, I don't know for sure? Al and Mia are back to ignoring our phone calls and text messages. DEEP BREATH! This will kill my son this will be the death of him.
You have NO IDEA how painful this is