Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Junkie... whoa that one really hurt!

It started with a song I heard on the radio yesterday, a song I used to sing to Al when he was little. It sent my emotions off. I can't help it. He's my SON.

I messaged two people I love, two people I trusted, two people in my  family. I just typed what I was feeling at the moment, I was venting. The condescending messages that followed crush me. Out of all the words that where said the one that rang the loudest to me was the word “junkie”. I quote... "He's a junkie" It pierced my heart and left me wounded. I’m not sure I can recover from that one?!

 

8 comments:

Erin said...

I remember when my ex-husband came over to my house and called my son a junkie, it wounded him beyond belief. His self-esteem was already low.

People are clueless when it comes to addiction, I was clueless until it happened to my son. I always thought that anyone who used heroin would be found in an alley until my eyes were opened.

I'm sorry you had to hear that and feel the hurt that comes from people's ignorance. I have to admit it again until it happened in my household I was as ignorant as the next person.

Al's Mom said...

Erin...THANKS friend.

Mamma P said...

We have all heard those words..and they hurt so badly..sometimes there are blessings with this Journey of addiction..as Erin stated one of them is "we" learn not to Judge,think before we speak..It is out of ignorance they say these things.It gives me an opportunity to educate them ! Do they listen ? Most don't ;) I have lost a few Very good friends over their words about my son..BUT I have also made some wonderful ones in the addiction Community :) Hugggs

Liz said...

Your son is ILL... He is drug sick. People just don't understand the illness of addiction. I am so sorry you had to hear that.

Anonymous said...

I have not talked/seen any of my family in 22yrs...since this nightmare started. My family knows nothing of his addiction. My shame is/was so great I did not even attend my own mothers' funeral. I would be to afraid of comments that would be said; even if they were true, their words would cut to deep...I have let my sons addiction hold me hostage this long.

Al's Mom said...

Words hurt more than I even realized. I guess your all right about so many things. Learned the following...

1. Words hurt, truly hurt!
2. Ignorance is truly bliss
3. Shame is normal for this type of illness... very few understand it, very few can withstand it.
4. Unconditional love does exist.
5. Somethings you say you can't take back.

Thanks everyone for your kind and caring comments. It helps... it really helps!

Dad and Mom said...

I learned it is about knowledge and experience.

I'm the FIRST to admit before our family experience I knew exactly what a junkie was, how worthless a druggie life was to the all of us normal people. I knew that the only problem with druggies was they just needed to stop taking drugs, it was just that simple. It was all so simple and the answers were obvious. Plus we wouldn't have all these dopeheads if parents would have done their job parenting.

I was so dumb.

What does it take for most of us to learn? All it takes is a simple experience. We learn from experience, at least we all hope too. The trouble is most of us find it impossible to learn from experience we have never had.

Words hurt, I agree. Forgiveness eases the pain. Sometimes it is said to hurt but my experiences have been that people say what they say due to lack of knowledge and lack of experience.

For me, once I was able to forgive myself it became easier to forgive all of those that hurt me. Let go of blame and shame and others will see that love is the base of your being, not fear. With that they become more open to what they could learn by being your friend or relative instead of sitting high on their perch.

Al's Mom said...

How do you do it? Your advice is so powerful (Dad & Mom)I'm going to let go and hope for the best. One things for certain is I love my family to death... I hope they love us the same. Time will tell.

http://parentsofanaddict.blogspot.com/

Thank you!