My thoughts, my heartache my life with my addicted son...
Monday, November 11, 2013
It's those quiet moments when I'm all alone in the house that get to me. That's when I can hear my thoughts about my son going around and around in my head. Those are the times when I lose my courage and my hope fades and I can feel my heart ache. I miss him, the real him that's deep within his soul, the boy I raised. I start to think about all the "I should of's" and I beat myself up for it. My son is a drug addict and our family is broken because of it. I was always ashamed to admit it... because our children are suppose to be a reflection of us, right? He wasn't raise this way... I was a stay at home mom! I took him to school and went on field trip with him when he was young! I took him to all his baseball and football practices? I went to all his games? I thought I showed him unconditional love? So how did this happen to my son? I wish I had an answer but I don't. He was my baby, my first born and in his DNA was a piece of me.
I'm not sure why I started a blog... I guess I hope that someone will read this and it helps them.